you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Randomize
