Rock
Scissors
Fuck
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I could have mohawked her pubes.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
