listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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