if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Randomize