Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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