Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Randomize
