It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
