Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
