I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
Randomize
