just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
