he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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