another moral hangover. fuck.
dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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