Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Pappa wants mamma naked
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
Randomize
