We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize
