Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
