just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Randomize
