Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
