I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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