Why did I cab home last night?
Because you said you were drunk, sad, and someone called you a hooker.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Randomize
