I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Randomize
