what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
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