oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
Randomize