My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Randomize
