this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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