yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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