She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
