it was like his penis was on wheels.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
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