4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Randomize
