It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
