Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
