Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
this must be what syphilis tastes like
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
