Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
