he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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