some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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