So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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