the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
