ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
