You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
Randomize
