SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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