Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
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