I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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