its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
