i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
