hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
