My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
Randomize
