OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Randomize
