i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
