he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I have already put on my inside pants.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize