I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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