my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize